The Biggest Problem In Your Relationship is That Every Time You Try to Talk About It You Get Into an Argument
Also, you keep blaming each other for it. Imagine that your relationship interactions are like a game you are playing with your partner. Games have rules. One of the rules of your game is that we don’t talk about the rules of the game we’re playing. If you were to talk about the rules, you would discuss things such as:
- How do we come to a compromise when what we both want is mutually exclusive?
- Who has the right to make decisions without consulting the other person?
- How do we have difficult discussions without escalating into a shouting match? (Sex, Finances, Division of Labor)
A common joke argument among couples is “Which Way Does The Toilet Paper Roll Go.” It seems silly until you realize that what you are arguing over is “Who has the right to make a final decision in this relationship?”. What if the final decision is about where we live, whether or not we have kids, or even whether or not we stay together?
The Biggest Fear You Have About Therapy is That I Am Going To Pick a Side and Its Not Going To Be Yours
I know this because no matter whether or not it’s individual, couple, or family therapy, there comes the point where my clients trust me. Once you realize that I believe you are both doing the best you can with what you know, that I am genuinely not judging you, and that the reason I know your interactions so well is that I have been there. Something changes. Our conversations shift because you both know that I am not picking sides; I am clarifying what the sides are.
I Will Teach You How To Talk About Your Relationship Without it Turning Into An Argument
In the relationships I specialize in helping I know that one partner feels like “no matter what I do, no matter how I say, no matter how I communicate it my partner just doesn’t listen and won’t change.” The other feels like “No matter how much I change, no matter how much I try, it just never seems to be good enough.” You both love each other very much, and the truth is that it isn’t enough. As long as you waste time on learning love languages, arguing about emotional labor, and taking turns calling each other the narcissist in a codependent relationship, you will never learn how to communicate effectively. That game will continue until something or someone stops it. You don’t need advice. You need information about your communication with each other. The only way to get that is to ask someone outside of your relationship that you trust. In order to build that trust, I need to show you that I know what I am talking about. In our Free 30 Minute Consultation, I will teach you how to talk about your relationship without it turning into an argument.
Location. Rates. Insurance.
I offer traditional in-office therapy, teletherapy, and in-home therapy services. In-Home therapy pricing depends on distance. My base rate for therapy is $200 per hour. I do offer financial scholarships for those clients who clearly feel like I am the best therapist for them and I clearly feel like they are the best clients for me.